What is happening to me
What happened to the familiar grounds of my mind that once upon a time i’d gladly stroll through
the field of neural connections made by my brain i would sit and reside where the grass was always green and skies of blue remained the same now grey and the absence of the sun invites clouds of endless rain.
Looking around, I see unfamiliar roots planting themselves,
placing their poison strategically browning my lawn of peace.
Weeds and unwanted growth, birthed from one or two words all those years ago are finally beginning to grow.
The earth, turning rotten with thoughts of defeat and a false sense of death causes me to at times believe in freedom but as one stem is destroyed three grow in its place.
what is happening to me?
the hope i had twenty four hours in a day, slowing fading away and has started hiding meanwhile I’m trying to seek it.
See it, seeing nothing but the field around me, no evil in sight but the spirit lingers like the stench emanating from the rotten dirt.
My own worth in my eyes deteriorating and the truth in my Maker’s eyes i can’t imagine to come to life in me although the death’s purpose was for the chains of insecurity to loose from me, left on the tree of Calvary bathed in blood for all to see that the Savior left no deed undone, every lie of the enemy dealt with under the setting sun, the Son’s spirit melting away only to rise on the third day.
Never again shall my brain fall victim to the roaring lion, whose mane is made of discouragement and pain;
inflicting loneliness and the broken spirit of Cain, a beast who’s feat is to mentally defeat and destroy my strength in Him,
a beast who aims to elevate his untruths above the truest words spoken built to revive my broken bones.
Every stick, every stone, thrown by he who so pridefully craved the throne, his heart caused his fall.
Every scratch that beat down the wall of security, peace and sanity in my mind’s sanctuary has been rebuilt.
Stronger than before, no weapons formed, no arrows shot, no degrading thoughts can remove my tree rooted in and growing in Christ.
Every weed attempting to choke the Christ in me, the sword of His word will remind me of words spoken over me and the rotten dirt that dares to cover up the truth will forever be washed away, by blood red blood that forever sets me free and puts my mind at ease.
The greenery that once grew, uninterrupted will stay evergreen.
Never changing and everlasting.
Poet’s notes :
“This piece literally describes what was happening in my head. I see my mind as a field, and when it’s infected, I can see the manifestation. This is my journey from being bound by past heartbreak to moving on to a better life trusting that anything that exalts itself above God’s Word is invalid and is planted to destroy.” 2 Corinthians10:5 says “we demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and we take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ”.
This scripture was one which motivated her fight the battles in her mind with the confidence that God has given us authority to destroy anything that goes against his perfect nature i.e everything that goes against love, against purity and against fearlessness. We fight with the spirit of God as David did to defeat Goliath and it is because of this Spirit that we should have hope. You’re more than a conqueror!